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April 30, 2021
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A regular feature of groups is our trans and non-binary members talking about feeling that they have to answer questions that other people have about transition and the trans+ experience.

Many of these people are well meaning and trying to be allies, and most will have no idea that the person they are asking is tired from answering these questions from so many people.


Sometimes the best way to be an ally is to take some of that pressure off the trans+ person – but you probably know that because you’re here reading this, and if you’re a regular reader of my blog you’ll have noticed this message in the past.


So how can you help?


Find your information elsewhere. This blog, vocal trans+ people (there are plenty out there) who are happy to talk about their experiences, and training such as the training that we offer.

Check in with the trans+ person you know. Are they happy to answer questions? Is there a place that they recommend that you look for further information? Do they want support from you, such as talking to someone else who will not stop asking them questions? Have they got support in place, such as the support that Chrysalis provide?

If someone is asking a lot of questions of a trans+ person in their life, talk to them about the things you’re able to, and signpost them on to the above options for other information.


These are simple things that we can all do for others in our lives that make up some of the most basic points of being an ally to someone. I have talked about them being applied to trans+ people, but they apply in all areas where someone might need an ally.

How are you being an ally to someone in need of one?



Interested in our training? Have a look at our training page.

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